Please put more jokes here

[vetran]

Joe Biden has announced that the US WILL be sending troops to Ukraine. They just need to wait for two things.

First,they need to wait for the British to start fighting

And second, they need to wait for two years.

[vetran]

Two Praying Mantises in a pub at closing time:

'Another pint before we hit the road, mate?'

'Might as well. The wife's going to bite my head off when I get home anyway.'

[NotAllThere]

Joe Biden has announced that the US WILL be sending troops to Ukraine. They just need to wait for two things.

First,they need to wait for the British to start fighting

And second, they need to wait for two years.

Who helped the Limies out of two world wars?
Yeah, and who was late for both of them.

[WTFH]

Ukraine has a comedian for a president.
The UK has a joke for a prime minister.

[vetran]

Who helped the Limies out of two world wars?
Yeah, and who was late for both of them.

Ah excellent I don't need to explain the joke for you!

Do you know why they call us Limies?

[vetran]

My wife actually beat me in an argument convincingly when I presented mountain of legit evidence that masks, lockdowns, vaccines, mandates, etc, all did **** all, and my wife simply said all the measures did work."


"How the feck is that ?"

"They got Trump out."

[vetran]

I bet Rick Astley struggles with Lent.

[WTFH]

Annual reminder that if you don't make a pancake joke early enough on Shrove Tuesday, by the time you do, all that's left are the crêpe ones, which fall flat and make you feel like a tosser.

[NotAllThere]

Message from the Ukrainian Tax Office.

“Have you captured a Russian tank or armoured personnel carrier, and are worried about how to declare it? Keep calm and continue to defend the Motherland! There is no need to declare them as income.”

[vetran]

Mark Zuckerberg wanted to change the name of Facebook in order to reflect its true purpose, so he chose the snappy 'Meta'

As he didn't think 'A Vehicle For Low Class users To Express Their Relentless Self Pity and Humiliate Their Children By Airing Their Personal Family Business All Over The Internet' would stick in people's minds.