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Please put more jokes here

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    There are 10 types of people: those who know binary, and those who don't, and those who weren't expecting a ternary joke.
    Down with racism. Long live miscegenation!

    Comment


      Apparently there is a documentary on TV about the G spot, but I can't find it...
      "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

      I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

      Comment


        I went into a pub and said to the guy serving, 'How much is a pint of lager?'

        He replied, 'Five hundred and sixty-eight millilitres.'

        Sarcastic barsteward.
        "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

        I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

        Comment


          A mate of mine suffered a fatal heart attack after downing a dozen energy drinks.

          Red Bull gives you wings...
          "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

          I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

          Comment


            My daughter's on the spectrum.

            She wanted the latest iPad but I thought she should learn the way I did.
            "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

            I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

            Comment


              Boris shouldn't let his mind wander.

              It's too little to be let out alone.
              "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

              I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

              Comment


                My energy supplier proudly boasts that they use 100% renewables. They sent my renewal quote.

                Can anybody tell me what day it was, when wind doubled in price?.
                "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                Comment


                  What does LGBTI+ stand for?


                  No one can give me a straight answer
                  "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                  I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                  Comment


                    What's wrong with Channel 4?. They do an expose of the Jeremy Kyle show and don't call it:

                    Death on the Kyle.
                    "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                    I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                    Comment


                      BREAKING NEWS:

                      I've got TWO weeks to live.


                      The wife's going away for a fortnight!
                      "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                      I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                      Comment

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