• Visitors can check out the Forum FAQ by clicking this link. You have to register before you can post: click the REGISTER link above to proceed. To start viewing messages, select the forum that you want to visit from the selection below. View our Forum Privacy Policy.
  • Want to receive the latest contracting news and advice straight to your inbox? Sign up to the ContractorUK newsletter here. Every sign up will also be entered into a draw to WIN £100 Amazon vouchers!

Please put more jokes here

Collapse
X
  •  
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

    There are 10 types of people: those who know binary, and those who don't, and those who weren't expecting a ternary joke.
    Down with racism. Long live miscegenation!

    Comment


      Apparently there is a documentary on TV about the G spot, but I can't find it...
      Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

      Comment


        I went into a pub and said to the guy serving, 'How much is a pint of lager?'

        He replied, 'Five hundred and sixty-eight millilitres.'

        Sarcastic barsteward.
        Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

        Comment


          A mate of mine suffered a fatal heart attack after downing a dozen energy drinks.

          Red Bull gives you wings...
          Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

          Comment


            My daughter's on the spectrum.

            She wanted the latest iPad but I thought she should learn the way I did.
            Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

            Comment


              Boris shouldn't let his mind wander.

              It's too little to be let out alone.
              Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

              Comment


                My energy supplier proudly boasts that they use 100% renewables. They sent my renewal quote.

                Can anybody tell me what day it was, when wind doubled in price?.
                Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

                Comment


                  What does LGBTI+ stand for?


                  No one can give me a straight answer
                  Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

                  Comment


                    What's wrong with Channel 4?. They do an expose of the Jeremy Kyle show and don't call it:

                    Death on the Kyle.
                    Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

                    Comment


                      BREAKING NEWS:

                      I've got TWO weeks to live.


                      The wife's going away for a fortnight!
                      Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

                      Comment

                      Working...
                      X