Please put more jokes here

[WTFH]

In other news the Government has announced that you are allowed to play sport with MEMBERS OF YOUR OWN FAMILY.

Accordingly, Norwich v Ipswich will be going ahead on Friday night as planned....

KUATB

[WTFH]

There aren’t any downright stupid pasta names but there are a fusilli ones

[vetran]

A shop assistant fiercely fought off an armed robber with his labelling gun, yesterday.
Police are now looking for a man and say there's a price on his head

[vetran]

So glad the golf courses are opening again.
I can take my dog for a proper tulip now.

[vetran]

I bought a fanny shaped Chinese vase at auction.

Apparently it's from the Minge Dynasty.

[vetran]

When it comes to my job, the people above me always get the most credit and respect.




Then again, I guess that's to be expected when you're a pallbearer.

[vetran]

Drug dealers you can go back to work.

Shop lifters you'll have to wait till July.

[vetran]

My local Alcoholics Anonymous meetings happen in a tree-house up a ladder.It's a 12-step program.

[vetran]

and for our congregation:

So there I was -- out of work, day drinking in my underwear and moaning about the future.





Then the coronavirus hit.

[vetran]

I saw a woman had broken down at the side of the road.


I didn't stop to help her.


I'm not a psychiatrist.