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Please put more jokes here

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    What did Katie Price say to King Kong?


    Is it in yet?
    "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

    I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

    Comment


      Who's old and decrepit and can't walk round their garden any more?










      Joe Biden.
      "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

      I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

      Comment


        Like MF I try to have a balanced diet.

        Unfortunately, it's usually a Turkey Leg in both hands.
        "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

        I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

        Comment


          Not for LM

          They say wine improves with age...


          But I still hate it and I'm 45.
          "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

          I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

          Comment


            Not getting enough steps in during the bad weather?


            Simply walk around the house after the wife and kids turning the flaming lights off.
            "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

            I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

            Comment


              I'm not saying I am a tulip fisherman but the only thing I have caught since Brexit is Covid
              "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

              I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

              Comment


                As I was admiring my new rifle, my wife yelled, "You've already got fifteen. You've got a problem!"


                She's right, you know. I need some pistols.
                "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                Comment


                  A woman found hanged in woodland was named locally.


                  What a stupid name, no wonder she killed herself.
                  "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                  I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                  Comment


                    Originally posted by vetran View Post
                    A woman found hanged in woodland was named locally.


                    What a stupid name, no wonder she killed herself.
                    My cousin hung himself in the woods, around Woking/Guildford way IIRC.

                    Comment


                      Originally posted by ladymuck View Post
                      My cousin hung himself in the woods, around Woking/Guildford way IIRC.
                      My brother used a door. Which was not strong enough. So he died from strangulation. At least he left with a smile on his face.

                      Whatever happened to the joke thread?

                      Comment

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