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Please put more jokes here

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    BREAKING NEWS: Jeff Bezos to step down as Amazon CEO.





    He will be leaving with an excellent package.... slightly damaged and delivered three doors down.
    "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

    I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

    Comment


      I wasn't at all surprised when my ancestry DNA test confirmed I was 5% Eskimo.


      As soon as I saw the results, I was like, "INUIT"
      "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

      I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

      Comment


        Just been to see a pantomime, but it was ruined by political correctness


        Snow Green and the Seven Persons of Restricted Growth
        "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

        I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

        Comment


          Today’s children are going to grow up thinking noses & mouths are private parts.
          "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

          I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

          Comment


            My wife's an absolute treasure...


            ..by that, I mean; you'll need a map and a shovel to find her
            "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

            I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

            Comment


              My father used to say "time is the best healer".
              Great bloke, terrible A&E consultant.
              "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

              I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

              Comment


                Man walks into a library and ask for a book on turtles
                "Hardback?" Says the Librarian
                "Yeah and little heads".
                "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                Comment


                  Why do aeroplanes not fly over Liverpool, when going from London to Glasgow?


                  They need the wheels for landing.
                  "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                  I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                  Comment


                    Originally posted by vetran View Post
                    My bathroom light just went out.


                    I wonder where it's going.
                    Originally posted by vetran View Post
                    My bathroom light just went out.


                    I wonder where it's going.
                    I don't know. Where are they going?


                    I don't know. Where are they going?
                    Down with racism. Long live miscegenation!

                    Comment


                      I was in the interrogation room last night, but I refused to say a word.


                      I don't think I should be a policeman.
                      "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                      I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                      Comment

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