COOKING Greek food for my wife tonight, looking forward to the St Valentine's Moussaka.
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“The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain” -
TELL someone you no longer love them by booking a Valentine's meal at somewhere with a Just Eat sticker in the window.“The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain”Comment
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An old boy is driving along the M1 in his1960 Morris Minor, panicking over the speed of the other road users when his phone rings.
"Albert," she says, "please be careful when you're driving back. I just heard on the radio that there's a lunatic on the M1 and he's driving the wrong way!"
"Its not just one" Albert replies, "there's bloody hundreds of them!"“The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain”Comment
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What's red and bad for your teeth?
A brick…Maybe we ain’t that young anymoreComment
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Did you hear about the two guys who stole a calendar?
They each got 6 months.…Maybe we ain’t that young anymoreComment
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I think I want a job cleaning mirrors.
It's something I could see myself doing…Maybe we ain’t that young anymoreComment
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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the toilet?
Because the P is silent.…Maybe we ain’t that young anymoreComment
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I asked a certain Welsh poster how many sexual partners he'd had.
He started counting but he fell asleep.…Maybe we ain’t that young anymoreComment
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I was in the pub with the missus last night, and I said, "I love you." She said, " Is that you or the beer talking?"
I replied, "It's me, talking to the beer"...Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
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I'm setting up a help group for bike riders who ignore red lights. Please fell free to join Cyclists Unable to Notice Traffic Signals.Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
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