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    The level of pollution in the world today is becoming unbearable. I feel ashamed to be human. Only the other day I opened a can of sardines to find it was full of oil and all the fish were dead.
    "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

    I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

    Comment


      My sex life is like a Ferrari.


      I don’t have a Ferrari.
      "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

      I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

      Comment


        I heard on the radio today that the average person only recycles 3 bottles of wine per year! How dare you? Every week I recycle dozens of wine bottles and beer cans. Come on people!!! I can’t fix global warming by myself.
        "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

        I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

        Comment


          Really hate my nine to five job.











          Starting work at 4:51 is ridiculous
          "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

          I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

          Comment


            Originally posted by vetran View Post
            I heard on the radio today that the average person only recycles 3 bottles of wine per year! How dare you? Every week I recycle dozens of wine bottles and beer cans. Come on people!!! I can’t fix global warming by myself.
            KUATB
            {emotionless greeting}

            Three Word Slogan

            Comment


              I saved my mistress’ phone number as ‘LOW BATTERY’ and set it to not ring.


              Whenever she calls and I’m not around, the missus takes the phone and plugs it to the charger unknowingly.
              "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

              I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

              Comment


                I really can't understand my wife. She said to me, "Fine - have a tattoo".

                Then she complains about the marching band in the front garden

                Comment


                  Why does a chicken coop have two doors?

                  Because if it had four, it'd be a chicken sedan.

                  Comment


                    I wish a prison informant would foil a plot to kill nearly ten people. Just to see the headline , A snitch doing time saves nine.
                    "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                    I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                    Comment


                      Katie Hopkins, 45, has been permanently banned by Twitter for breaching its rules on abuse and hateful conduct.


                      I'm genuinely stunned.


                      Looking at her face, I thought she was 65.
                      "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                      I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                      Comment

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