Please put more jokes here

[vetran]

I can't blame Messi...I'd be crying if Barcelona stopped paying me a million a week too!

[vetran]

The local music shop was bugled last night. They took all the brass instruments.

[vetran]

For perfect burgers every time cook them on a George Formby.




They've turned out nice again

[vetran]

Grandad didn't mind if people came round while he was working


Lovely man, tulip anaesthetist

[vetran]

10 mins after drinking an energy drink I started mincing and angrily shouting abuse at strangers.


I should really lay off the Gaytirade

[ladymuck]

How did the hacker evade the police?

He just ransomware!

[WTFH]

My wife's weird, last week she said she wouldn't mind if I had a tattoo, today she's complaining about all the bagpipers in the garden.

[vetran]

So let me get this straight. Prince Andrew is being prosecuted in the United States for having underage sex with a 17-year-old girl........in Ghislain Maxwells House.........In Belgravia, London, because if it was prosecuted in the UK, she is legally allowed to have sex, so no case to answer.

Does this also explain why they wanted to prosecute Anne Sacoolas in the UK, because in the US driving on the wrong side of the road and killing a motorcyclist is perfectly legal.

[vetran]

What's the difference between a torpedo and a priest? The "tor" bit

[vetran]

Did you hear about the millipede who had sex last night?

He got his leg over, leg over, leg over, leg over, leg over......