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Please put more jokes here

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    Originally posted by NotAllThere View Post
    I don't know. Where are they going?


    I don't know. Where are they going?

    Hey we all make mistakes.
    Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

    Comment


      When I woke up from my operation a nurse was leaning over me and said "you may not feel anything from the waist down."


      So I fondled her tits.
      Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

      Comment


        The wife asked me to pick up a bottle of milk from the Co-op.



        When I got there it was just a wooden hut full of pigeons?
        Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

        Comment


          My wife asked me to smother her with kisses in bed last night.


          So I drew two x’s on my pillow and held it over her face.
          Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

          Comment


            I woke up this morning to find that I was vegan, thought that black lives matter and believed in God.


            It's amazing...


            what I'll do for a shag.
            Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

            Comment


              Originally posted by vetran View Post
              Hey we all make mistakes.
              As the Dalek said, climbing off a dustbin.
              Down with racism. Long live miscegenation!

              Comment


                Originally posted by NotAllThere View Post
                As the Dalek said, climbing off a dustbin.
                The 1970s called. They want their joke back.

                Comment


                  not punny

                  1. The fattest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference. He ate too much pi.


                  2. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it was an optical Aleutian.


                  3. She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still.


                  4. A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class as a weapon of maths disruption.


                  5. No matter how much you push the envelope, it remains stationery.


                  6. A dog gave birth in the park and was cited for littering.


                  7. A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart.


                  8. Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.


                  9. A hole was found in a nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it.


                  10. Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.


                  11. Atheism is a non-prophet organization.


                  12. Two hats were hanging on a hat rack. One said: "You stay here; I'll go on a head."


                  13. I wondered why the cricket ball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.
                  Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

                  Comment


                    Carnage in Kilmarnock as nutter stabs nurse then goes on the rampage.


                    Nicola Sturgeon has made a statement blaming the English, Brexit and Covid
                    Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

                    Comment


                      On Christmas morning, my girlfriend always reminds me that the joy is in the giving.


                      But, if that's true, why is a blow job out of the question?
                      Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

                      Comment

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