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Please put more jokes here

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    #9031
    If I had sex with Santa would that make me a hohoho-mosexual?
    "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

    I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

    Comment

      #9032
      Boris Johnson held and emergency cabinet meeting today.




      Tomorrow it's going to be Pinot Grigio.
      "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

      I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

      Comment

        #9033
        I've been watching a lot of "reality" porn lately.



        You know, where the couple go to bed but never have sex.
        "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

        I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

        Comment

          #9034
          The answers to last week's Meg Ryan quiz were:
          yes, yes! YES, YES!
          "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

          I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

          Comment

            #9035
            Have you donated money to the Conservative party but not yet received a Knighthood?



            You may be entitled to compensation...
            "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

            I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

            Comment

              #9036
              Think I'll declare war on Afghanistan or somewhere like that.

              I quite fancy a knighthood.
              "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

              I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

              Comment

                #9037
                Former Labour Prime Minister Tony Blair is made a Sir in the New Year Honours list. He's in good company...Rolf Harris, Jimmy Savile, 'Prince' Naseem, Robert Mugabe, Benito Mussolini, Stuart Hall.
                "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                Comment

                  #9038
                  An electron goes into a bar. The barman asks him "Where's proton?"

                  "He couldn't come. He's positive".
                  Down with racism. Long live miscegenation!

                  Comment

                    #9039
                    I wanted to tell a joke about vaccination.

                    But you wouldn't get it.
                    Down with racism. Long live miscegenation!

                    Comment

                      #9040
                      What do vampires drink to get drunk?


                      Bloodweiser
                      "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                      I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                      Comment

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