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    Since they call Australia "The Land Down Under"


    Shouldn't they call Scotland "The Land Hung Over?"
    "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

    I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

    Comment


      True Story.
      I just got a message from my doctor's surgery telling me to contact them to make an appointment for a Covid jab.
      When I called them they said I'll need to go to Lords Cricket Ground next Wednesday at 10:00.
      I said "How's that".......
      Miserable bunch, no sense of humour.
      "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

      I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

      Comment


        Whoever said there's no I in team has clearly never worked with a Dyslexic.
        Last edited by vetran; 18 February 2021, 14:52.
        "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

        I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

        Comment


          I volunteered to help in the local hospital. They asked me to take samples from patients to the urology department. Is that taking the piss?
          "A people that elect corrupt politicians, imposters, thieves and traitors are not victims, but accomplices," George Orwell

          Comment


            Tonight we’re having Himalayan rabbit stew for supper... I found Himalayan on the road!
            "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

            I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

            Comment


              I was working my first day as an office boy at the BBC HQ. The office manager brought me over to a filing cabinet and said: "Please arrange our files in alphabetical order."
              I took one out and asked: "This one is Jimmy Saville's. Do I file it under "J" or "S"?
              The manager replied: "P. That's the pedo file".
              "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

              I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

              Comment


                My wife left me last week, she said she was going to get some milk and never came back.
                My mum called and asked me how I was coping?
                "Not bad" I said, "I've been using that powdered stuff"
                "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                Comment


                  There's just no need for women to behave the way they do when there on the blob..






                  Total ovary action
                  "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                  I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                  Comment


                    Gary Glitter has been given the covid vaccine in prison


                    He has had a prick in him for a change
                    "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                    I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                    Comment


                      NASA have landed a Rover on Mars after a 300million mile voyage.


                      Blimey, the one I drove in the 90s barely used to make it to Sainsbury's.
                      "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                      I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                      Comment

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