I have an empty school hall for sale.
Assembly required.
Assembly required.
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I was being interviewed by the Police after being stabbed several times, the officer said:
“Can you remember anything specific about the incident?”
I said, “yes, while it was happening, all I could hear was Space Oddity.”
The officer said, “ah, so we’re looking for an assailant using a Bowie knife.”Comment
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My next door neighbour knocked my door last night, wearing lingerie and stockings and asking to borrow a cup of sugar and if I wanted to come over for a night cap
I said "Piss off Steve I've got work in the morning".Comment
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Most of the attractive, single women I meet are divorced.
From reality.Comment
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That's great news James Hewitt is going to be a grandfather again.Comment
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Why are the Chinese no good at Cricket?
Because they eat all their bats!Comment
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Oh, for all these years I wrongly thought it was Space Odyssey.I said, “yes, while it was happening, all I could hear was Space Oddity.”bloggoth
If everything isn't black and white, I say, 'Why the hell not?'
John Wayne (My guru, not to be confused with my beloved prophet Jeremy Clarkson)Comment
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I'm not trying to show off or anything, but I've already got a date for New Year's Eve.
It's December 31stComment
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for G-Jabs
I was talking to a fat bird. She said "A lot of guys find plus-size women attractive, what about you?
I said "As a matter of fact yes, lots of guys find me attractive too."Comment
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Bored during lockdown????
Call a women’s group and ask to speak to the man in charge.....Comment
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