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Please put more jokes here

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    I'm extremely passionate about preserving endangered animals.



    You should taste my panda Jam or rhino chutney.
    "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

    I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

    Comment


      My mate said "I'm going to try and plant horse chestnuts across the four corners of the earth"


      ******* idiot, he's only trying to conker the world
      "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

      I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

      Comment


        Never insult an Italian baker...


        He'll beat the focaccia!!
        "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

        I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

        Comment


          An Alaskan woman has been attacked by bear while using an outside toilet.


          Obviously too cold for the bear to tulip in the woods.
          "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

          I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

          Comment


            For Lent this year I'm giving up.
            "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

            I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

            Comment


              I said, "It's not about how many times you fall, it's about how many times you get up."


              "That's not how sobriety tests work," replied the cop.
              "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

              I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

              Comment


                I live in a little village called ‘Notinservice’ just outside the main town ‘Sorry’


                Not much to do but what a great bus service
                "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                Comment


                  If only 6 of the 7 Dwarfs turned up for work would they be short staffed?
                  "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                  I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                  Comment


                    one for the ladies..

                    Once there was a female brain cell who accidentally ended up in a man’s head. She looked around but it was all empty. “Hello?” she cried, but no answer. “Is there anyone here?” Silence. “HELLO!
                    Then she heard a very faint voice from far, far away…
                    “We’re down here!”
                    "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                    I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                    Comment


                      Tall people are superior to midgets!


                      I'm a height supremacist.
                      "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                      I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                      Comment

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