Please put more jokes here

[shaunbhoy]

A bear walks into a bar and says, "Give me a whiskey and .............. cola."

"Why the big pause?" asks the bartender. The bear shrugged. "I'm not sure; I was born with them."

[shaunbhoy]

What can think the unthinkable? 
An itheberg.

[shaunbhoy]

Roman: A martinus please.


Barman: You mean a martini?


Roman: If I’d wanted a double, I’d have asked for one.

[shaunbhoy]

What’s the difference between ignorance and apathy?
 I don’t know and I don’t care.

[shaunbhoy]

My dyslexia has just hit a new owl.

[shaunbhoy]

Conjunctivitis.com – that’s a site for sore eyes.

[shaunbhoy]

Life is all about perspective. The sinking of the Titanic was a miracle to the lobsters in the ship's kitchen.

[shaunbhoy]

Before I criticize a man, I like to walk a mile in his shoes. That way, when I do criticize him, I'm a mile away and I have his shoes.

[shaunbhoy]

I am known at the gym as the "before picture."

[shaunbhoy]

A friend of mine tried to annoy me with bird puns, but I soon realized that toucan play at that game.