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Please put more jokes here

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    The Beach Boys walk into a bar.....
    'Round?'
    'Round?'
    'Get a round'
    'I get a round?'
    'Get a round.....'
    “The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain”

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      The saddest thing about trying to find a needle in a haystack is that your horse is hiding a drug habit from you.
      “The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain”

      Comment


        My wife just asked me if her Appendix scar made her look unattractive.
        Apparently the response, "Don't worry babe, your tits cover it", wasn't the answer she was looking for.
        “The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain”

        Comment


          What time does Saddam Hussain have his dinner?

          When Tariq Aziz

          Comment


            Man walks into his local Taleban pub and says to the landlord "Osama bin in?"

            Comment


              too true

              "I'm going to the doctor," says Mary.

              "Why, what's wrong?" asks her best friend Sara.

              "I want to ask him how many calories there really are in sperm."

              Sara says, "Why worry? If you're swallowing that much, no man is going to care if you're a bit chubby."
              "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

              I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

              Comment


                A new version of the world map has been drawn.
                The North Pole is at the top, the South Pole is at the bottom, and all the other poles are in Britain.
                "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                Comment


                  I went down on one knee last night.

                  Oral sex isn't the same since the wife had her leg amputated.
                  forward
                  "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                  I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                  Comment


                    A Jamaican walks into a bank with a 25kg bag of marijuana and hands it over to the cashier... Shocked, the cashier asks..'What's this for?' The Rastafarian replies..'Me here to open a joint account'
                    "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                    I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                    Comment


                      I knew I shouldn't have let my dyslexic wife organise our wedding. At the reception there was a magnificent centipede in the middle of every table.
                      "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                      I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                      Comment

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