• Visitors can check out the Forum FAQ by clicking this link. You have to register before you can post: click the REGISTER link above to proceed. To start viewing messages, select the forum that you want to visit from the selection below. View our Forum Privacy Policy.
Collapse

You are not logged in or you do not have permission to access this page. This could be due to one of several reasons:

  • You are not logged in. If you are already registered, fill in the form below to log in, or follow the "Sign Up" link to register a new account.
  • You may not have sufficient privileges to access this page. Are you trying to edit someone else's post, access administrative features or some other privileged system?
  • If you are trying to post, the administrator may have disabled your account, or it may be awaiting activation.

Previously on "Please put more jokes here"

Collapse

  • WTFH
    replied
    I've almost finished my A to Z of Lionel Richie songs, but I'm stuck on u.

    Leave a comment:


  • WTFH
    replied
    Lots of people in my meditation class have complained about the teacher so now he has been referred to the ommmmmmmbudsman.

    Leave a comment:


  • WTFH
    replied
    *Enter New Password*


    PopeyewithnoSpinach



    *Password is not strong enough*

    Leave a comment:


  • WTFH
    replied
    It’s my wife’s birthday in a couple of weeks and she’s been leaving jewellery catalogs all over our house.



    So I've taken the hint and got her a magazine rack.

    Leave a comment:


  • WTFH
    replied
    I opened 3 birthday cards yesterday and I feel so grateful for all the money I received.


    Being a postman has such great perks.

    Leave a comment:


  • WTFH
    replied
    I feel so lucky to have my sheepdog because good ones are hard to come-bye.

    Leave a comment:


  • vetran
    replied
    one for Warty:

    I walked in the pub with my missus and the barman said, "Punching above your weight there aren't you, pal? Where did you find her?"

    "I met her in Thailand," I replied. "We're due to get married next month."

    "You don't want to get married," he said. "That's when the blowjobs stop."

    "I don't mind that," I replied. "I hate giving them to her
    anyway."

    Leave a comment:


  • vetran
    replied
    I've had a brilliant idea, where illegal immigrants have to hunt down child molesters for a chance to win citizenship.

    It'll be called aliens vs predators

    Leave a comment:


  • WTFH
    replied
    The Verve are playing a gig at our dilapidated village hall.


    It will have to be an acoustic set though, because the plugs don't work.

    Leave a comment:


  • WTFH
    replied
    Today someone told me I am average.



    I told them that’s just mean.

    Leave a comment:


  • ladymuck
    replied
    Originally posted by vetran View Post
    Jimmy Choo used to be called Matt Choo but changed it because he was sick of everyone saying "pitchu?" whenever he introduced himself
    An alternative...

    Leave a comment:


  • NotAllThere
    replied
    Originally posted by vetran View Post
    I'll never date a mime again, they're just too quiet in bed.
    Oh, but the skillful hands!

    Leave a comment:


  • WTFH
    replied
    My bear's diarrhoea problems are starting to worry me.




    The vet says he's getting better but he's not out of the woods yet.

    Leave a comment:


  • WTFH
    replied
    "My wife keeps mistaking me for Alice in Wonderland characters."


    "Are you mad at her?"


    "Oh no, not you too".

    Leave a comment:


  • vetran
    replied
    Jimmy Choo used to be called Matt Choo but changed it because he was sick of everyone saying "bless you" whenever he introduced himself

    Leave a comment:

Working...
X