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Please put more jokes here

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    I got on a bus near Bond St tube station.

    I said to the driver "do you stop at the Dorchester".


    He said "what, on my wages".
    Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

    Comment


      The world tongue twister champion was killed in a horrific accident today, he was run over by a red lorry, then a yellow lorry, then a red lorry.
      Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

      Comment


        Have you ever considered that your whole purpose in life is to be a warning to others?
        Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

        Comment


          For Warty

          Not saying I’m unattractive, but last night my right hand told me it had a headache.
          Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

          Comment


            I went to a fancy dress party as a mushroom. I wanted people to think I was a fungi to be with.
            Down with racism. Long live miscegenation!

            Comment


              Beyoncé has stared a support group for women suffering from Herpes Zoster.

              It's for all the Shingle ladies.
              Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

              Comment


                "Five people were killed in a bow and arrow attack in Norway."

                "Feck. Was it a crossbow?"

                "Well, it wasn't a very happy one."
                Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

                Comment


                  I've just tried the new recipe lower fat and reduced salt KFC. It's a lot like my jokes.

                  Not funny, but utterly tasteless.
                  Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

                  Comment


                    actually not funny

                    With the media reporting on all the shortages in the country I'm surprised there's been no mention so far of common sense, forward planning and a competent government.
                    Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

                    Comment


                      What's a vegan's favourite website?

                      QuornHub
                      Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

                      Comment

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