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Please put more jokes here

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    My son begged me to buy him a Theremin.

    But then he never even touched it.
    "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

    I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

    Comment


      There was a young man from Poole, Who found a red ring on his tool, So he went to the clinic,

      But the doctor, a cynic, Said, use WD40, it's lipstick, you fool.
      "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

      I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

      Comment


        Phew. Independence Day over and no alien invasion to deal with. I was worried - Will Smith is always involved and is clearly Earth's primary defender. He knocked one of the invaders out with one punch back in the 90's, but his lame Chris Rock bitch slap shows Earth's is now vulnerable to attack.
        "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

        I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

        Comment


          Nothing makes a 4th of July more independent than shooting off fireworks that are made in China.
          "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

          I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

          Comment


            My dad used to have a job at a helium balloon factory until they let him go.
            {emotionless greeting}

            Three Word Slogan

            Comment


              What's blue and not very heavy?



              Light blue.
              {emotionless greeting}

              Three Word Slogan

              Comment


                What Blue and tastes like Red paint?





                Blue paint.
                {emotionless greeting}

                Three Word Slogan

                Comment


                  I only believe in 12.5% of the Bible.



                  I guess that makes me an eighth-theist.
                  {emotionless greeting}

                  Three Word Slogan

                  Comment


                    Narcissistic men more likely to suffer from premature ejaculation, study finds.

                    Yeah, no matter what, they always come first.
                    "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                    I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                    Comment


                      I actually hope aliens don't exist.

                      If there is life on other planets the government would only start giving them our money.
                      "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                      I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                      Comment

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