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Please put more jokes here

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    Just saw a lady at the checkout buying some chilli powder & I thought.. 'she?s gonna spice her life up! '
    "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

    I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

    Comment


      From now on you have to ask for Viagra by its full medical name.

      Mycoxafloppin.
      "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

      I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

      Comment


        My friend lost their job in digital media after coming out as non-binary.
        "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

        I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

        Comment


          A friend arrived home exhausted from an all-night orgy, her dress splattered with the semen of several different men.
          Looking despairingly at the washing machine, she asked me:
          ?Which setting will be best in order to remove all these stains??
          ?Try Mixed Load? I replied.
          "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

          I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

          Comment


            Boris Johnson must have got tulipfaced at all those lockdown parties.

            From the pictures I've seen, everything was just a blur to him.
            "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

            I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

            Comment


              Going to publish a book called ‘Bird Watching’ which is all about accidental Spoonerists.
              {emotionless greeting}

              Three Word Slogan

              Comment


                Brewerkz Brewery in Singapore is turning recycled urine into beer, unlike Fosters who have been doing it the other way around for years.
                "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                Comment


                  Vatican investigates possible miracle as UK government inexplicably finds £10bn for energy bills just 24 hours after the Sue Gray report.
                  {emotionless greeting}

                  Three Word Slogan

                  Comment


                    My wife is thinking of leaving me because of my obsession with poker.


                    But I think she's bluffing.
                    {emotionless greeting}

                    Three Word Slogan

                    Comment


                      I invented a new word!
                      Plagiarism!
                      "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                      I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                      Comment

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