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Please put more jokes here

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    A father called his daughter and announced that he intended...for reasons unknown to change his name to spinal column...she explained she was very busy and would just have to call him back..
    "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

    I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

    Comment


      The unhappy scientist who turned himself into a cloud of tiny water droplets suspended in the atmosphere has died.



      He'll be sadly mist.
      {emotionless greeting}

      Three Word Slogan

      Comment


        So an ex-prime minister is shot in Japan.

        Boris, you might want to lay off the pies... be a bit less of an easy target.
        "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

        I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

        Comment


          I would love to get paid to sleep.


          It would be a dream job.
          {emotionless greeting}

          Three Word Slogan

          Comment


            Originally posted by WTFH View Post
            I would love to get paid to sleep.


            It would be a dream job.
            Not for me, I reckon it would be a nightmare

            Comment


              Originally posted by ladymuck View Post

              Not for me, I reckon it would be a nightmare

              ah one of my favourites if he overacted more he would be in space!

              "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

              I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

              Comment


                I got pulled over by the police once for running a red light.

                The policeman said, 'Have you been drinking, Sir?'

                I replied, 'Yeah, loads of times. Great fun, isn't it?'
                "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                Comment


                  One time this hippy threw a joss stick at me.

                  I was incensed.
                  "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                  I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                  Comment


                    If elected, Rishi Sunak will bring diversity to the office of Prime Minister. He was educated at Winchester instead of Eton.
                    "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                    I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                    Comment


                      I thought my wife was going to decorate the house with French flags, but instead she littered the house with packets of wine gums and jelly babies.

                      "It's Pastille Day," said the silly cow.
                      "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                      I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                      Comment

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