• Visitors can check out the Forum FAQ by clicking this link. You have to register before you can post: click the REGISTER link above to proceed. To start viewing messages, select the forum that you want to visit from the selection below. View our Forum Privacy Policy.

Please put more jokes here

Collapse
X
  •  
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

    Every time I see my fat mate I always take the piss and ask him why he hasn't started jogging yet.

    It's a running joke.
    "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

    I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

    Comment


      News: William Shatner, 90, becomes oldest person in space.

      Upon return, his nappies were filled with Klingons
      "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

      I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

      Comment


        For blokes everywhere

        Can't believe the Government's issued a directive to get your Xmas shopping early because of supply issues..

        For ****s sake, I'll have to do it on December 23rd now..
        "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

        I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

        Comment


          A dyslexic criminal enters a library looking for a shorter sentence.
          "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

          I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

          Comment


            What nationality were Adam and Eve?

            Soviet, of course. Who else would well around barefoot and naked, have an apple to share between them, and think they were in Paradise?
            "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

            I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

            Comment


              Police pulled over a hazelnut chocolate for doing 130 on the m1.

              It was a Ferrari Rocher
              "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

              I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

              Comment


                The Wombles were planning a trip to the Olympic park in Stratford.
                "We can go on the District line or the Overground".
                "How much will the train cost?".
                "It won't cost anything".
                "Why?"
                "Underground, Overground Wombles are free".
                "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                Comment


                  I keep eating my feather pillow in my sleep. It’s really starting to depress me.

                  Down in the dumps?

                  I don’t know, I haven’t been yet.
                  {emotionless greeting}

                  Three Word Slogan

                  Comment


                    Originally posted by WTFH View Post
                    I keep eating my feather pillow in my sleep. It’s really starting to depress me.

                    Down in the dumps?

                    I don’t know, I haven’t been yet.
                    That's a tulip joke.
                    "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                    I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                    Comment


                      I saw an ex-Coronation Street actor and a jockey on the set of a children's TV show in Scotland.

                      Watts, Detori, in Balamory, wouldn't you like to know?
                      "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                      I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                      Comment

                      Working...
                      X