• Visitors can check out the Forum FAQ by clicking this link. You have to register before you can post: click the REGISTER link above to proceed. To start viewing messages, select the forum that you want to visit from the selection below. View our Forum Privacy Policy.
  • Want to receive the latest contracting news and advice straight to your inbox? Sign up to the ContractorUK newsletter here. Every sign up will also be entered into a draw to WIN £100 Amazon vouchers!

Please put more jokes here

Collapse
X
  •  
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

    I went bobsleighing the other day, killed 250 bobs
    Originally posted by Stevie Wonder Boy
    I can't see any way to do it can you please advise?

    I want my account deleted and all of my information removed, I want to invoke my right to be forgotten.

    Comment


      I still love to spoil my wife. When she works late she calls me before leaving work. Then I will run her hot water, stir the bubbles just right so that as soon as she gets in, she can start the dishes!
      “The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain”

      Comment


        The surgeon said to me, "Do you have a dog?"
        I said, "Yes, why?"
        He said, "If I can't save your leg, do you want me to keep the bone for him?"
        “The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain”

        Comment


          A friend of mine thinks the story of how he got an orthopaedic shoe is hilarious but I think he's built it up too much.
          “The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain”

          Comment


            Took a girl back to mine earlier for sex.
            When she said, 'im gonna leave my bra on cos ive only got tiny tits'
            so i said, 'ok i'll leave my pants on then !'
            “The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain”

            Comment


              Surely the Israeli Dairy Council have run a campaign with the tag line 'Cheeses Of Nazareth'?
              “The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain”

              Comment


                My mate just rang me in tears, his wife has left him, and taken his prized Bob Marley collection and satellite dish!
                Poor devil, no woman no sky.
                “The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain”

                Comment


                  Someone sent me a tantric text once.... it took ages to come
                  Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

                  Comment


                    SAVE money on Prosecco by simply putting Lambrini through a Soda Stream and getting over yourself.
                    “The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain”

                    Comment


                      Still waiting for that magical day where I ring a call centre that isn't experiencing an extremely high volume of calls.
                      “The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain”

                      Comment

                      Working...
                      X