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Please put more jokes here

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    Just had a good night out down the pub so I jumped in a taxi and said "take me to where I can get my cock sucked for a tenner mate"

    Bit gutted when he took me to our house
    "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

    I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

    Comment


      So Diane Abbot has Type 2 diabetes and can't count.

      Well that explains why Theresa May , who has Type 1 diabetes , got 318 seats in Parliament when she was probably counting on 100 more.
      "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

      I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

      Comment


        I just haven't been feeling myself lately.

        I've got a new girlfriend.
        "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

        I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

        Comment


          I hate when movie franchises have so many sequels, they end up nothing like the original.

          Take The Xmen, for example..

          Feck all like The Omen.
          "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

          I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

          Comment


            Theresa Dismay.
            "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

            I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

            Comment


              If I had a £1 for every duplicate Diane Abbott diabetes joke on Suckipedia today, I'd be able to fund an entire Police Force.

              Yes £84.33p
              "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

              I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

              Comment


                Originally posted by vetran View Post
                Theresa Dismay.
                From now on, all policies will by MayDUP
                Best Forum Advisor 2014
                Work in the public sector? You can read my FAQ here
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                Comment


                  A teacher was telling her students about human anatomy in a sex education class. She took her pointer and pointed to the picture of a male and a female.

                  "The female has two breasts and one vagina. The male has one penis."

                  A little boy in the front row jumped up and said that the teacher was wrong.

                  "My daddy has two penises. He has a short one that he pees with and a long one that he brushes Mommy's teeth with!"
                  "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                  I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                  Comment


                    If a man says he will do something, he will do it.

                    There is no need to remind him every 6 months.

                    Comment


                      men wish

                      I went into a shop the other day and bought some of those new super-sensitive condoms.

                      They're brilliant! They hang around after you **** off and talk to the bird about "relationships"...
                      "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                      I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                      Comment

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