I went bobsleighing the other day, killed 250 bobs
- Visitors can check out the Forum FAQ by clicking this link. You have to register before you can post: click the REGISTER link above to proceed. To start viewing messages, select the forum that you want to visit from the selection below. View our Forum Privacy Policy.
- Want to receive the latest contracting news and advice straight to your inbox? Sign up to the ContractorUK newsletter here. Every sign up will also be entered into a draw to WIN £100 Amazon vouchers!
Please put more jokes here
Collapse
X
Collapse
-
Originally posted by Stevie Wonder BoyI can't see any way to do it can you please advise?
I want my account deleted and all of my information removed, I want to invoke my right to be forgotten. -
I still love to spoil my wife. When she works late she calls me before leaving work. Then I will run her hot water, stir the bubbles just right so that as soon as she gets in, she can start the dishes!“The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain”Comment
-
The surgeon said to me, "Do you have a dog?"
I said, "Yes, why?"
He said, "If I can't save your leg, do you want me to keep the bone for him?"“The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain”Comment
-
A friend of mine thinks the story of how he got an orthopaedic shoe is hilarious but I think he's built it up too much.“The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain”Comment
-
Took a girl back to mine earlier for sex.
When she said, 'im gonna leave my bra on cos ive only got tiny tits'
so i said, 'ok i'll leave my pants on then !'“The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain”Comment
-
Surely the Israeli Dairy Council have run a campaign with the tag line 'Cheeses Of Nazareth'?“The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain”Comment
-
My mate just rang me in tears, his wife has left him, and taken his prized Bob Marley collection and satellite dish!
Poor devil, no woman no sky.“The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain”Comment
-
-
SAVE money on Prosecco by simply putting Lambrini through a Soda Stream and getting over yourself.“The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain”Comment
-
Still waiting for that magical day where I ring a call centre that isn't experiencing an extremely high volume of calls.“The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain”Comment
- Home
- News & Features
- First Timers
- IR35 / S660 / BN66
- Employee Benefit Trusts
- Agency Workers Regulations
- MSC Legislation
- Limited Companies
- Dividends
- Umbrella Company
- VAT / Flat Rate VAT
- Job News & Guides
- Money News & Guides
- Guide to Contracts
- Successful Contracting
- Contracting Overseas
- Contractor Calculators
- MVL
- Contractor Expenses
Advertisers
Contractor Services
CUK News
- IT contractor demand lunged towards growth in April 2026 May 13 04:48
- What does PGMOL’s win over HMRC mean for contractors? May 12 07:25
- Contractors eyeing mortgages ‘unrealistic about BoE’s 3.75% hold decision’ May 11 07:50
- The fake job problem is getting worse. Are contractors a particularly easy target? May 8 07:49
- Government policy on freelancing is stopping the contractor model from doing its thing May 7 08:12
- Contractors, can the new HMRC loan charge settlement opportunity reduce your bill? May 6 07:51
- PGMOL’s ‘not finely balanced’ win over HMRC could be ‘persuasive’ in IR35 cases May 5 07:10
- Is Reporting Company Payments to Participators a concerning consultation for contractors? Apr 29 07:38
- Now it’s finally here, how is HMRC Joint & Several Liability risk being managed, and is payment control the holy grail? Apr 28 06:55
- How Managed Service Providers (MSPs) are hit by HMRC’s Joint & Several Liability Apr 27 06:08

Comment