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Please put more jokes here

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    The wife's never happy.


    I told her I worship the ground she walks on.


    She said she'd prefer me to worship her and not the ground.
    "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

    I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

    Comment


      Originally posted by vetran View Post
      nope some women are petty clever, at least the women aren't stupid enough to post pictures in the wrong thread!
      Good joke from the guy who deleted the picture he posted!
      {emotionless greeting}

      Three Word Slogan

      Comment


        If anyone's got any old toy story characters they don't want give me a buzz
        "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

        I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

        Comment


          My girlfriend reckons I'm "out of shape".
          My way of thinking is 'pear is a shape'.
          "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

          I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

          Comment


            "Biden’s coughing during campaign speech alarms supporters"


            It shouldn't. It proves he's still alive.
            "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

            I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

            Comment


              I saw sign outside the gym. It said: Open 24/7.


              I thought, "That's blooming useless. July is ages away."
              "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

              I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

              Comment


                I released my own fragrance today.




















                No one else on the bus seemed to like
                "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                Comment


                  I was just washing up, with the back door open, when suddenly, an owl flew in.


                  It dried all the pots and put them away then flew right back out.!
                  Couldn’t believe it!


                  Think it was a Teat Owl….
                  "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                  I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                  Comment


                    "Harry and Megan accuse the uk of structural racism"


                    For anyone who is unfamiliar with that name, do you remember around 10 years ago there was a ginger lad going around in a nazi uniform shagging soap stars...
                    "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                    I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                    Comment


                      Originally posted by vetran View Post
                      The wife's never happy.


                      I told her I worship the ground she walks on.


                      She said she'd prefer me to worship her and not the ground.
                      My girlfriend worshipped the ground I walked on.
                      In a fit of jealousy and rage
                      I dug up my footprints.

                      (Steve Turner).
                      Down with racism. Long live miscegenation!

                      Comment

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