Please put more jokes here

[WTFH]

The Wife (tm) just asked “If you were stuck on a desert island, what three records would you like”.
I said “the long distance swimming would be good”.

[WTFH]

Brillo’s wife dressed up as a policewoman and told him he was under arrest on suspicion of being good in bed.

After 2 minutes all charges were dropped due to a lack of evidence...

[vetran]

Is it just me or are there less people applauding the NHS now Boris has survived Coronavirus?

[LondonManc]

Is it just me or are there less people applauding the NHS now Boris has survived Coronavirus?

Fewer

[vetran]

for Brillo:

When I was a lad my Dad told me about the birds and the bees.Just my luck to marry a praying mantis.

[vetran]

one for WTFH:

If you're nice and quiet, you can hear the wind rush through the trees.As I reload my shotgun.

[vetran]

one for NLyUK:

A union for Dominatrices has collapsed 1 year after being set up.None of then would pay their subs.

[vetran]

Save your wank until 8pm on Thursday so it sounds like the whole street is cheering you on .

[vetran]

one for GJABs

First time i visited Scotland i was asked if i would like to do the Gay Gordon.I never felt so disappointed.





How was i to know it was a dance?

[vetran]

I was watching a film about pole dancing with the wife. I said "you'd be great at that"

she said "oooh, do you really think so!"

I said "yeah, you could stuff £20k in your knickers "