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Please put more jokes here

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    The Wife (tm) just asked “If you were stuck on a desert island, what three records would you like”.
    I said “the long distance swimming would be good”.
    {emotionless greeting}

    Three Word Slogan

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      Brillo’s wife dressed up as a policewoman and told him he was under arrest on suspicion of being good in bed.

      After 2 minutes all charges were dropped due to a lack of evidence...
      {emotionless greeting}

      Three Word Slogan

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        Is it just me or are there less people applauding the NHS now Boris has survived Coronavirus?
        "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

        I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

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          Originally posted by vetran View Post
          Is it just me or are there less people applauding the NHS now Boris has survived Coronavirus?
          Fewer
          The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world that he didn't exist

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            for Brillo:

            When I was a lad my Dad told me about the birds and the bees.Just my luck to marry a praying mantis.
            "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

            I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

            Comment


              one for WTFH:

              If you're nice and quiet, you can hear the wind rush through the trees.As I reload my shotgun.
              "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

              I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

              Comment


                one for NLyUK:

                A union for Dominatrices has collapsed 1 year after being set up.None of then would pay their subs.
                "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                Comment


                  Save your wank until 8pm on Thursday so it sounds like the whole street is cheering you on .
                  "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                  I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                  Comment


                    one for GJABs

                    First time i visited Scotland i was asked if i would like to do the Gay Gordon.I never felt so disappointed.





                    How was i to know it was a dance?
                    "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                    I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                    Comment


                      I was watching a film about pole dancing with the wife. I said "you'd be great at that"

                      she said "oooh, do you really think so!"

                      I said "yeah, you could stuff £20k in your knickers "
                      "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                      I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                      Comment

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