Veteran, that is one of my favourite jokes.
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Originally posted by WTFH View PostVeteran, that is one of my favourite jokes."If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."
I want to see the hand of history on his collar.Comment
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Religious tulip Taoism tulip happens.
Buddhism If tulip happens, it's not really tulip.
Islam If tulip happens, it's the will of Allah.
Protestantism tulip happens because you don't work hard enough.
Judaism Why does this tulip always happen to us?
Hinduism This tulip happened before.
Catholicism tulip happens because you're bad.
Hare Krishna tulip happens rama rama.
T.V. Evangelism Send more tulip.
Atheism No tulip.
Jehova Witness Knock knock, tulip happens.
Hedonism There's nothing like a good tulip happening.
Christian Science tulip happens in your mind.
Agnosticism Maybe tulip happens, maybe it doesn't.
Rastafarianism Let's smoke this tulip.
Existentialism What is tulip anyway?
Stoicism This tulip doesn't bother me."If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."
I want to see the hand of history on his collar.Comment
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What do you call a drunken Muslim? A: Mohammered."If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."
I want to see the hand of history on his collar.Comment
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My mate was bleeding really seriously , and the first aid book told me to apply plenty of pressure.
So I told him if he didn't stop bleeding right away, he'd die."If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."
I want to see the hand of history on his collar.Comment
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I was in bed with a woman and she said, I want tonight to be magical
And it was. After we had sex, I disappeared."If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."
I want to see the hand of history on his collar.Comment
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Warning to all the ladies...
Do not die a virgin...
Seriously, there are terrorists waiting for you up there."If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."
I want to see the hand of history on his collar.Comment
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For MF
Whats the difference between a hippo and a zippo ?
Ones a little heavy and the other is a little lighter."If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."
I want to see the hand of history on his collar.Comment
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For NLUK
My wife's a nymphomaniac who works nights on a psychiatric ward
Apparently she's f**king nuts"If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."
I want to see the hand of history on his collar.Comment
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For MP
Mary Poppins has moved to L.A. where she has opened a fortune-telling shop specializing in predicting future bad breath. The sign outside reads: Super California Mystic Expert: Halitosis"If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."
I want to see the hand of history on his collar.Comment
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