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Please put more jokes here

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    one for bremoaners

    When I die I'm going to donate my body to science.

    That's the only way I'll ever get into medical school.
    "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

    I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

    Comment


      oh Kim

      Police have ruled out pirates being involved in the Kardashian robbery.

      They said "if it were pirates they would have definitely taken her booty"
      Last edited by vetran; 12 October 2016, 23:47.
      "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

      I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

      Comment


        The problem with the clown crisis at the minute is that there could be literally hundreds of them in one car.
        {emotionless greeting}

        Three Word Slogan

        Comment


          I sit at work today drinking Coke, doing some stuff with Excel tables when suddenly my boss puts his hand into my pants, jerks me off, and then goes back to his previous work like nothing happened. Being self employed has its positives.
          "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

          I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

          Comment


            Quiz time Folks: The Bangles sang a song called, Walk Like an:

            A) gyptian

            B) gyptian

            C) gyptian

            D) gyptian

            E) gyptian.
            "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

            I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

            Comment


              Sexual intercourse: It's just wanking that's got out of hand.
              "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

              I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

              Comment


                If a immigrant and a paedophile were to fight would it be called Alien vs Predator
                "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                Comment


                  Just got back from a holiday in Thailand and I came so close to shagging a ladyboy!
                  Looked like a lady, walked like a lady, kissed like a lady.... It was only when she drove me back to her place and reversed the car into the garage first time, I thought to myself "Hang on a ******* minute"
                  "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                  I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                  Comment


                    I understand Recep Erdogan is going to call for a referendum on changing the state religion to Christianity. Turkey's voting for Christmas.
                    "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                    I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                    Comment


                      I was having sex with a woman when her husband came home early.
                      She told me to use the back door and I'd have to be quick.
                      In retrospect I should have just left, but it's not every day you get an offer like that.
                      "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                      I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                      Comment

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