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Please put more jokes here

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    #id
    Tragic news from the Nestle factory today as a worker was crushed to death under hundreds of boxes of chocolates.
    He tried in vain to get help but every time he shouted, "The milky bars are on me!!" --his fellow workmates just cheered

    Comment


      #id
      My girlfriends dog just died so I got her an identical one.

      Now she's got two dead dogs.

      Comment


        #id
        Sinéad O'Connor has offered to sing the Prince classic at Barry Chuckle's funeral.


        Nothing Compares 2 U 2 Me

        Comment


          #id
          I tried to warn my now deceased son about the dangers of Russian Roulette.

          It went in one ear and out the other.

          Comment


            #id
            Funeral costs are so bloody expensive these days. At my mother-in-law's, after paying for the bouncy castle and pony rides, we could barely afford the face-painting.

            Comment


              #id
              I'm a Bit Worried! I attended a funeral today and caught the wreath!

              Comment


                #id
                Today I saw someone waving but I wasn't sure if they were waving at me or someone behind me.

                I'm a terrible lifeguard.

                Comment


                  #id
                  To anyone who has watched the Madeliene Mcann series.


                  Well done you have now spent more time watching her…
                  than her parents did.

                  Comment


                    #id
                    What do you call it if the mum dies during childbirth? Eternity leave

                    Comment


                      #id
                      In today's news: 'Ryanair passenger dies of heart attack at 35,000ft in front of his grandchildren.'


                      He must've had a look at the price list for snacks.

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