Please put more jokes here

[ladymuck]

COVID19. The longest something made in China has ever lasted.

Century!

[ladymuck]

Sainsbury's are reporting shortages of salsa and guacamole.

It's a double-dip recession.

[xoggoth]

COVID19. The longest something made in China has ever lasted.

That's how to get rid of it. Plug it in to charge and it will probably explode.

[vetran]

The last time the world saw a virus response this bad was when Jimmy Saville took his laptop to currys.

FTFY

[WTFH]

New airport codes for current travel plans:
LVG - Living Room
DNG - Dining Room
BTH - Bathroom
GDN - Garden
PAT - Patio
MBR - Master Bedroom
OFC - Office
WNC - Wine Cellar
SHD - Shed

[ladymuck]

New airport codes for current travel plans:
LVG - Living Room
DNG - Dining Room
BTH - Bathroom
GDN - Garden
PAT - Patio
MBR - Master Bedroom
OFC - Office
WNC - Wine Cellar
SHD - Shed

KTN - Kitchen
SCL - Scullery

[xoggoth]

New airport codes for current travel plans:
LVG - Living Room
DNG - Dining Room
BTH - Bathroom
GDN - Garden
PAT - Patio
MBR - Master Bedroom
OFC - Office
WNC - Wine Cellar
SHD - Shed

Funny, yesterday I set up a list in Excel almost exactly like that to log when I last bothered to clean.

[vetran]

On my e-harmony profile I said that I prefer quality over quantity.



It just sounds better than 'no fat birds'.

[vetran]

I'm loving this lockdown.This week I've had no work, a steak lunch each day, sex in four different rooms and I've been pissed every night.



And to think I could've been stuck at home with the wife instead of the pub.

[vetran]

I've just ordered a self-help book for men who can't orgasm.




It can't come soon enough.