• Visitors can check out the Forum FAQ by clicking this link. You have to register before you can post: click the REGISTER link above to proceed. To start viewing messages, select the forum that you want to visit from the selection below. View our Forum Privacy Policy.

Please put more jokes here

Collapse
X
  •  
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

    For AssGuru

    Ever met someone and immediately wanted to buy them a toaster for the bathtub ?
    "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

    I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

    Comment


      One.

      How many psychics does it take to change a light bulb?
      "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

      I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

      Comment


        I was nervous about meeting new people on a cruise,
        until I realised, we are all in the same boat.
        "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

        I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

        Comment


          What's the difference between roadkill and a dead chav?

          Roadkill has skid marks in front of it.
          "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

          I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

          Comment


            For NLYUK

            Goerdie goes with a prostitute from Wigan. Drops his pants gets his cock out &
            the lass says by thats a gud un!
            He says whats a gud un?
            She reply's it means a big one.
            ...
            She drops her knickers & he says by that's a canny un. She says whats a canny un?
            He reply's a ******* big valley that cowboys ride through!
            "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

            I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

            Comment


              IKEA are now selling lesbian beds.

              No nuts or screws just tongue and groove.
              "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

              I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

              Comment


                For NLUK

                A couple just got married, and when the husband went back to his house he found that his bride had disappeared. He got very worried and gathered up all his friends to search for his wife with no success.

                Two days after his wife disappeared the man returned home to find her in the kitchen. He asked her what she has been up to and why she hasn't been home for so long.

                She replied: "These four men kidnapped me and had wild sex with me for a week."

                The husband answered: "But it's only been two days what do you mean a week?"

                "I am only here to get something to eat."
                "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                Comment


                  I went to see my Grandmother the other day. She's 98.

                  What are you so happy about, I asked her.

                  I broke a mirror this morning, she replied.

                  But that means seven years of bad luck, I said.

                  I know, she said, beaming. Isn’t it ******* wonderful”
                  "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                  I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                  Comment


                    For Mrs MF

                    I'm not saying my husband is fat.

                    But if I had to pick five of the fattest people I could think of, he would be three of them.
                    "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                    I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                    Comment


                      For our Divorcees

                      Attending a wedding for the first time, a little girl whispered to her mother, Why is the bride dressed in white

                      Because white is the colour of happiness, and today is the happiest day of her life, her mother tried to explain, keeping it simple.

                      The child thought for a moment, and then said, So why's the groom wearing black
                      "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                      I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                      Comment

                      Working...
                      X