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Please put more jokes here

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    I am trying to get some sleep. It's 2am and the woman next door is making a terrible racket.

    If she won't shut up I might even take her advice and call the police.
    Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

    Comment


      What do you call a homosexual Russian knight?

      Sergei.
      Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

      Comment


        One for Xoggy substitute Ass for breasts

        A man sees a lady with big breasts.

        He asks, "Excuse me, can I bite your breasts for $1000?" She agrees, so they go to a secluded corner. She opens her blouse and the man puts his face in her breasts for 10 minutes. Eventually the lady asks, "Aren't you gonna bite them?"

        He replies, "No, it's too expensive."
        Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

        Comment


          Mirror Mirror

          Mirror mirror on the wall
          Who's the fairest of them all
          The mirror sighed and gave a grunt
          And said "not you, you ugly cwnt"
          Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

          Comment


            One for MP

            I once went on a date with a girl who didn't swallow.

            Soup everywhere.
            Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

            Comment


              I got sacked from PC World today.
              A guy came in the store and asked me what was the best thing for finding your ancestors.
              I said “Probably a shovel.”
              “The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain”

              Comment


                APPLE. Break into the lucrative pirate market by developing the iPatch.
                “The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain”

                Comment


                  Go to O'Reilly's Auto Parts
                  Home Page | O'Reilly Auto Parts


                  Search for item 121G
                  …Maybe we ain’t that young anymore

                  Comment


                    Why did Tigger put his head down the toilet?

                    He was looking for Pooh.
                    The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world that he didn't exist

                    Comment


                      What's red, six inches long, three inches wide and gets women excited?
                      A £50 note.
                      The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world that he didn't exist

                      Comment

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