The weasel was very upset when he saw the badger ahead of him in the grocery shop ordering half a pound of tuppeny rice and half a pound of treacle.
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Please put more jokes here
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One for the Girls
A husband and wife are trying to set up a new password for their computer.
The husband puts, "Mypenis".
Wife ROFL at the message that pops up.............
"Error. Not long enough."If it looks like a duck, walks like a duck, quacks like a duck,it must be a duckComment
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One for the boys
You can tell if a woman likes you by her feet.
If they are behind her ears she likes you.Comment
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its what he would have wanted!
trading standards think I am tight for trying to get my money back on my Bottom Live DVD.
Rik Mayall has died only a few days after returning from filming in Portugal.
Lucky he died over here. If he'd died in Portugal it'd have taken the police a decade to find his body.
On hearing the sad news about Rik Mayall, David Walliams said: "He made me want to be a comedian."
Yeah, but Rik did good stuff too!!
and a twofer
I bet Jimmy Savile gets the horn when he finds out a young one has died!Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
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There's been a new therapy group set up for Tourettes sufferers,
'Tourette's Welfare And Treatment'.Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
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Justin Bieber's career in ruins.
Proving once and for all that racism can be a good thing.Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
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Scientists have found that married couples share similar DNA.
Mind you, the study was done in Norfolk.Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
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What's the difference between terrorism and democracy?
Whether the United States is attacking or being attacked.Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
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Nicolas Cage said in an interview that he avoids watching his own movies.
He's not the only one.Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
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My self harming, cannibal friend recently tried his hand at cooking.Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
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