Please put more jokes here

[vetran]

Up and down the country 96 gun salutes to commemorate the Queen, gun shots also heard in Liverpool but that was just a standard Friday.

[vetran]

Sports bosses: The Queen's dead, let's stop everyone working to show respect!.

Rail and Postal Union bosses: The Queen's dead, let's stop everyone going on strike, to show respect!.

[WTFH]

"That Sherlock actor stole my National Insurance card!"

"Benefit number snatch?"

"Yes, that’s him!"

[WTFH]

Astrology FACT: Due to people deliberately mispronouncing it’s name, NASA is planning to officially rename Uranus in 2023 after the Norse god of the sky, Upyåbumbum.

[vetran]

So we?re now going to be given all new coins with Prince Charles on. I?m not amused, I hate change.

[vetran]

Even though I live at number 6, I paint no 34 on my bin so the binmen leave it near my house.

[vetran]

How many folk in that queue will be disappointed when they realise it doesn't end in an Apple store

[vetran]

Bloody Magistrates.... just given me 6 months in Centre Parcs

[vetran]

Name a capital city which starts with a Q, has a Q in the middle and ends with a Q?

London for the next 4 days.

[vetran]

I'm skipping breakfast and dinner for the Queen's funeral on Monday.

McDonald's and Greggs will be closed.