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Please put more jokes here

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    For Warty


    Warty went to the doctor the other day for a routine check up
    Doctor said to me, "Ya know, you really have to stop masturbating"
    Warty said, "Really doc? Why's that?"
    He replied, "Because I'm trying to examine you!"
    "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

    I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

    Comment


      For NAT

      Watching Local Election Results
      Portsmouth - Hung
      Bolton- Hung
      Plymouth - Hung
      Wirral - Hung
      Thought I Was on GRINDR for a minute
      "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

      I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

      Comment


        Jacob Rees-Mogg today suggested that people having difficulty with the cost of living should simply cut their outgoings by moving into their smaller second home.
        "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

        I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

        Comment


          What does a fish like to smoke?
          Sea weed.

          How do you stop smoking sea weed?
          Sea kelp.
          "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

          I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

          Comment


            I just saw someone try to park a car for 10 minutes.

            I didn't see their face, so I'm not going to assume what gender she was.
            "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

            I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

            Comment


              The BBC have ruined Doctor Who by appointing Ncuti Gatwa as the new Time Lord.



              He will only be able to travel forward into the future as everyone knows, once you go black, you can never go back.

              "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

              I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

              Comment


                Will the atrocities in Ukraine never end?

                After the bombings and sieges now the poor bastards have to listen to Bono.

                The UN must intervene.
                "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                Comment


                  Like most men, I've given my car a pet name.


                  'START, YOU ******* PILE OF tulip!'
                  "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                  I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                  Comment


                    Originally posted by vetran View Post
                    Will the atrocities in Ukraine never end?

                    After the bombings and sieges now the poor bastards have to listen to Bono.

                    The UN must intervene.
                    They were invited and preformed to people already fans. The joke is too obvious - and inaccurate - to be funny. Furthermore, I'm not convinced I'd be happy to take a gig in what is still a war zone.
                    Down with racism. Long live miscegenation!

                    Comment


                      Originally posted by vetran View Post
                      ... once you go black, you can never go back.
                      Explain?

                      Down with racism. Long live miscegenation!

                      Comment

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