I love how music can take you to another place.
For example, the pub I'm in are playing Ed Sheeran, so I'm off to another pub.
For example, the pub I'm in are playing Ed Sheeran, so I'm off to another pub.
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After watching all 3 Matrix movies, I walked away feeling that they were completely unbelievable.
As much time as they spent on computers, not once did Adobe ask to be updated.Comment
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for MF
I'm the best Elvis impersonator for miles around.
I can't sing a note, but I had eight cheeseburgers for breakfast.Comment
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You don't need to go to University to suffer massive expense and boring lectures hungover after late nights.
Just get married.Comment
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One about SAS
My mate called me a retard yesterday.
I was that shocked I nearly choked on my window.Comment
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There's no point making puns with a kleptomaniac. They just take them, literally."Being nice costs nothing and sometimes gets you extra bacon" - Pondlife.Comment
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My girlfriend is leaving me because she's tired of my over-active imagination. Joke's on her, she doesn't even exist.“The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain”Comment
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I stopped a bloke in the street and said, "Can you help me? I'm looking for a rubbish tip."
He replied, "Liverpool to win the Premiership."“The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain”Comment
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The English football team visited a Muslim orphanage today.
"It's so heartbreaking to see their sad faces, devoid of hope," said Ahmed, aged 7.Comment
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"I'm not a fan of the new pound coin, but then again, I hate all change."
Pound coin gag scoops best Edinburgh Fringe joke award - BBC NewsComment
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