Please put more jokes here

[vetran]

For NLYUK

I run a gay escort agency in Scotland on the site on an old Starbucks

We mostly get asked for tall skinny laddies

[vetran]

Just think: next year, we'll be complaining about all of the new immigrants for coming into the country and stealing our jobs.

Those damned Scots!

[vetran]

What is the most common form of owl on owl violence?

Drive-by hootings.

[vetran]

"Haha! I'm f******g ROFL!"

Said Mr Harris' dyslexic cell mate.

[Oh Come On Not Again]

True story:

A Norwegian lumberman was chopping trees when he accidentally drove his ax into his back, just below the shoulder. His collegues quickly transported him to a hospital. The doctor, quite shocked, asked:
- Does it hurt you?
The lumberman replied:
- Only when I laugh.

[vetran]

What did Noel Gallagher say to his barber?

You're gonna be the one that shaves me

[vetran]

A Muslim girl has decided to go one better in Magaluf.

Instead of restricting herself to 24 guys, she's blown away the entire resort.

[vetran]

I've just seen the video of that woman in magaluf sucking off 24 guys. Not a single money shot, though. Not seen that many dicks unable to perform since England in the world cup

[vetran]

After reviewing the video footage online. The British girl in Magaluf has accepted she's brought shame on her family.

"I can understand why people have been slagging me off and rightly so. I admit, my technique was awful"

[vetran]

For NLYUK

A salesman went out of town for business.

After a couple of weeks he comes home and tells his wife about it. "Guess what dear, I earned 4000 dollars by selling 50 mattresses and 30 pairs of panties."

The wife replies "Really, well with just one mattress and no panties I earned twice as much."