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    The weasel was very upset when he saw the badger ahead of him in the grocery shop ordering half a pound of tuppeny rice and half a pound of treacle.

    Comment


      One for the Girls

      A husband and wife are trying to set up a new password for their computer.
      The husband puts, "Mypenis".
      Wife ROFL at the message that pops up.............
      "Error. Not long enough."
      If it looks like a duck, walks like a duck, quacks like a duck,it must be a duck

      Comment


        One for the boys

        You can tell if a woman likes you by her feet.

        If they are behind her ears she likes you.

        Comment


          its what he would have wanted!

          trading standards think I am tight for trying to get my money back on my Bottom Live DVD.



          Rik Mayall has died only a few days after returning from filming in Portugal.

          Lucky he died over here. If he'd died in Portugal it'd have taken the police a decade to find his body.


          On hearing the sad news about Rik Mayall, David Walliams said: "He made me want to be a comedian."

          Yeah, but Rik did good stuff too!!



          and a twofer

          I bet Jimmy Savile gets the horn when he finds out a young one has died!
          "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

          I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

          Comment


            There's been a new therapy group set up for Tourettes sufferers,
            'Tourette's Welfare And Treatment'.
            "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

            I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

            Comment


              Justin Bieber's career in ruins.

              Proving once and for all that racism can be a good thing.
              "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

              I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

              Comment


                Scientists have found that married couples share similar DNA.

                Mind you, the study was done in Norfolk.
                "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                Comment


                  What's the difference between terrorism and democracy?

                  Whether the United States is attacking or being attacked.
                  "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                  I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                  Comment


                    Nicolas Cage said in an interview that he avoids watching his own movies.

                    He's not the only one.
                    "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                    I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                    Comment


                      My self harming, cannibal friend recently tried his hand at cooking.
                      "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

                      I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

                      Comment

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