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Please put more jokes here

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    I've just seen a girl choking on a cocktail sausage.

    I went over to introduce myself.
    "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

    I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

    Comment


      OK who was this??


      Bought a really nice pair of curtains yesterday.

      So nice, in fact, that I ****ed them last night and wiped my cock on the wife.
      "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

      I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

      Comment


        I just failed my interview for a sales job. They asked me to describe what techniques I use to turn a "No" into a "Yes."

        Apparently Rohypnol isn't an appropriate example.
        "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

        I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

        Comment


          too true

          Man hits woman over the head with frying pan. - BBC drama

          Woman hits man over the head with frying pan. - BBC comedy.
          "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

          I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

          Comment


            Sorry Zeity

            I'm not coping well after breaking up with my Welsh girlfriend last week.

            The worst part is the long, sheepless nights.
            "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

            I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

            Comment


              I don't know why Jeremy Kyle has brought out a book.

              The only people who would want to read it, can't.
              "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

              I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

              Comment


                A man can't face waiting for his wife to give birth goes to the pub gets very drunk. He calls the hospital to find out how things are going, but accidently calls the cricket club instead.

                "All 10 are out, the last 2 are ducks".

                Comment


                  My Mrs is in hospital with what my Grandfather used to refer to as 'woman trouble'.





























































                  A broken jaw......
                  When freedom comes along, don't PISH in the water supply.....

                  Comment


                    How do you get a gypsy to take a bath ?

                    Leave it in your front garden
                    When freedom comes along, don't PISH in the water supply.....

                    Comment


                      Originally posted by vetran View Post
                      How do you get a gypsy to take a bath?

                      Leave it in your front garden
                      Originally posted by TestMangler View Post
                      How do you get a gypsy to take a bath ?

                      Leave it in your front garden
                      What's the French for déjà Vu?
                      Originally posted by Stevie Wonder Boy
                      I can't see any way to do it can you please advise?

                      I want my account deleted and all of my information removed, I want to invoke my right to be forgotten.

                      Comment

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