Please put more jokes here

[vetran]

L'Oreal cream for the elderly.

Because you were fit.

[vetran]

A bloke at work asked me earlier if I have ever paid for sex, to which I said yes.

"How much?" He asked.

"The house, the car, and only getting to see my kids every other weekend."

[vetran]

I was beating my masochist bilingual friend when she shouted "Merci!", I didn't know whether or not to carry on

[vetran]

I failed Binary 101.

I said it was 6.

[vetran]

Just bought this new 'Guess the Movie' board game
"Is it Argo?" Said my wife
I replied "No, its Elaine and Rob's turn"

[vetran]

I hate being married to an actress.

Every time you go to see one of her films, she talks the whole way through it.

[vetran]

I've just got a job stuffing animals..

I'm not a Taxidermist, I work at a McDonald's in Newcastle.

[vetran]

Prostitutes have a great work ethic.

Their customers always come first.

[vetran]

Raping choirboys.

It's a Cardinal sin.




sorry normally avoid really bad taste jokes but this one launched my coffee.

[vetran]

My wife and I have different tastes when it comes to sex. She likes it slow and tender...

And I like it with the neighbor.