Please put more jokes here

[NotAllThere]

Clinical geneticist: There's something wrong with your DNA. It seems it's been reversed.
Patient: And?

[vetran]

A recent study found that people who take their coffee black are more likely to exhibit psychotic traits.

And people who order a quad shot, non-fat, vanilla soy, extra foam, light whip with caramel drizzle are more likely to be their victims......

[vetran]

The first paramedic on the scene following Katie Price's accident shouted "where are you bleeding from?"


she replied "I'm from bleeding Essex of course"

[vetran]

My daughter texted me, "Dad - which is better, to pass or to fail?"

I replied, "To pass, of course."

She texted back, "Well, you'll be proud of me then. I've just passed my pregnancy test."

[vetran]

Coming soon to a cinema near you...

UK Trek 3...The Search for Fuel.

[vetran]

How do mermaids relax?
Seaweed

[vetran]

During the 1665 plague, Isaac Newton worked from home and developed his theories on gravity, calculus and optics.


During COVID, I discovered vodka.

[vetran]

My wife says she's leaving me because of my dyslexia.

I told her to shoot the dog on the way out.

[ladymuck]

A recent study found that people who take their coffee black are more likely to exhibit psychotic traits.

And people who order a quad shot, non-fat, vanilla soy, extra foam, light whip with caramel drizzle are more likely to be their victims......

This isn't a joke, it's fact

(I am a black coffee drinker)

[vetran]

Stallone "I'm making a movie about composers. I'm playing Vivaldi."

VanDamne "I'll be Mozart."

Schwarzenegger "Stop it guys, I'm not saying it."