Please put more jokes here

[vetran]

If smoking is bad for you, how come it cures salmon?

[vetran]

Old Greg is so ugly, that when he walked through a haunted house , he came out with a paycheck.

[vetran]

For the Bremainers

Do you reckon, in a few years, if Brexit goes really badly & the Brit economy tanks badly then rich Thai businessmen will be flying here to f**k
scouse birds?

[vetran]

I bought Bonnie Tyler's car last year on TradeMe.
It's blooming awful, every now and then it falls apart.

[vetran]

I paid a hooker £150 for the hour.
What a rip off. She saw me coming.

[LondonManc]

Do you reckon, in a few years, if Brexit goes really badly & the Brit economy tanks badly then rich Thai businessmen will be flying here to f**k
scouse birds?

No, even Thai businessmen have certain standards.

[vetran]

Before the election, Justin Bieber stated that he would move back to Canada if Trump won.

See what you've done now you little twerp?

[vetran]

Following Donald Trump's victory Nigel Farage said, "Is he going to offer me a job? I'm hoping he might do."

So Farage moves over there and takes some American's job. Every cloud has a silver lining...

[vetran]

This maths test can predict your favourite film. Not sure how it works but it does. Mine was Star Wars.
DON'T PEEP!

Pick a number between 1 and 9.

Multiply by 3.

Add 3 to that number.

Multiply by 3 again.

Add the 2 digits together.

Now discover your favourite film! scroll down














3. Oliver Twist.

4. Star Wars.

5. Forrest Gump.

6. Saving Private Ryan.

7. Jaws.

8. Grease.

9. The Joy of Anal Sex with Male Sheep & Oiled-Up Lady Boys.

10. Mary Poppins.

[vetran]

Some girl just asked me if I thought she was wearing too much make-up.

I said it depended on whether she was going to kill Batman or not.