Originally posted by vetran
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Please put more jokes here
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My mate said, "My kid has decided to turn vegan and won't eat any kind of meat. What can I replace it with?"
"A Labrador," I said, "they'll eat anything."Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
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My son went over to America and shot five black people.
The cops just sent him home.
They want to take the credit.Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
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After getting the windows on my car tinted black, I showed it to my wife.She said, "I wouldn't be seen dead in that thing!"I said, "That's sort of the point."Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
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for ms
I ate a kids meal in McDonald’s this morning. His mum was furious.Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
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I can't stand people who've had their phalanges removed.
I'm lack toes intolerant.Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
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When I take a sauna I have to be the only one in there.
I have selfish steam issues.Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
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for LM apparently
Justin Welby, the Archbishop of Canterbury, has announced he is to take a sabbatical 'for spiritual renewal'.
He must have quite a problem if it's going to take him all day Sunday to make a trip to the off-licence.Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
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I've pleaded with my wife to "stay at home" this Christmas.
Not cause of the virus, I just don't want to go to her mother's.Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
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for newer members
I walked up to the counter at Screwfix and said..
"do you have a bleeding valve for a radiator?"
The assistant replied..
"not with that attitude sir."Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
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