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Please put more jokes here

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    There are various ways to give up smoking - gum, patches, cold turkey. My gran used to pour a gallon of petrol on herself each morning.
    The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world that he didn't exist

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      Don't give up on your dreams.....keep sleeping!!
      “The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain”

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        True fact: You cannot lose a homing pigeon. If it doesn't come home, what you have actually lost is a pigeon.
        The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world that he didn't exist

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          Most liberals will do anything for the working classes; anything except mix with them.
          The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world that he didn't exist

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            Patience is like toilet role; the bigger the arsehole, the quicker it runs out.
            The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world that he didn't exist

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              I just deleted all the German names off my phone. It's Hans free.
              The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world that he didn't exist

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                Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse... but enough about Kanye West.
                The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world that he didn't exist

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                  If two clowns get divorced, is the fight for the kids a custardy battle?
                  The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world that he didn't exist

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                    GET that delicious slow-cooked ham hock result without the fuss by chewing up some gammon and drying it on the windowsill.
                    “The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain”

                    Comment


                      I went for an Indian last night.
                      The waiter came over and said,
                      "Curry okay?"
                      I replied, "Go on then, one song then leave me in peace"
                      “The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain”

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