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Please put more jokes here

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    Crazy how it's cheaper to buy a whole new squid than it is to replace the ink.
    “The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain”

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      Cost me a bloody fortune this week, my Facebook went down so I had to phone everyone to see what they were having for tea.
      “The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain”

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        William Shatner, alias Captain Kirk, has discontinued his ladies underwear range.
        In hindsight "Shatner Knickers" wasn't a good choice of name in the first place!
        “The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain”

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          My sister asked me if I wanted to wind her new born baby?
          I thought that was a bit harsh so I just gave him a dead leg instead
          “The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain”

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            Well, Mr. Joel, for someone who "didn't start the fire", you seem to know an awful lot about it.
            “The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain”

            Comment


              I was just looking at my ceiling...
              Not sure if it's the best ceiling in the world, but it's definitely up there.
              “The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain”

              Comment


                Spent 15 minutes grilling chicken, but it still won't talk about the whole 'road crossing' thing.
                “The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain”

                Comment


                  "If you win the lottery' the first thing I want is a boob job and a face lift"
                  said my 49 yr old girlfriend as I was checking my numbers,
                  "Actually the first thing I would buy is a recon engine and a respray for my mondeo" I replied
                  "Why bother tarting that old thing up she said you might as well get yourself a new one!"
                  My point exactly.
                  “The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain”

                  Comment


                    What are the 3 words you dread hearing while making love? "Honey I'm home"

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                      If you'd told me when I was 6 that my job as an adult would involve having to hold a mouse for most of the day, I'd have been very excited.
                      “The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain”

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