I joined a forum to discuss the joys of desserts - but when I complained about one that went mouldy they banned me for being off tapioca. I asked to be let back in, but they just say go.
- Visitors can check out the Forum FAQ by clicking this link. You have to register before you can post: click the REGISTER link above to proceed. To start viewing messages, select the forum that you want to visit from the selection below. View our Forum Privacy Policy.
- Want to receive the latest contracting news and advice straight to your inbox? Sign up to the ContractorUK newsletter here. Every sign up will also be entered into a draw to WIN £100 Amazon vouchers!
Please put more jokes here
Collapse
X
Collapse
-
-
If there is a massive covid outbreak at a Trump rally, is that a Klandemic?…Maybe we ain’t that young anymoreComment
-
Rumour has it there is going to be clapping for Vera Lynn
Don't know where,
Don't know when.…Maybe we ain’t that young anymoreComment
-
"I'll stop you wanking you dirty little bastard, " shouted my mum after she caught me with my dick in hand and picture of NLyUK on my computer."Not a flaming chance, " I yelled at her. Then the crafty cow threw a picture of Katie Hopkins down in front of me.Comment
-
I couldn't believe it when my wife was all over me last night and said, "Oh darling, you smell so sexy... come upstairs and give me the rogering of a lifetime ! What's that incredible new scent you're trying ?" "None," I replied, "But for dinner I just stopped at KFC."Comment
-
Comment
-
-
-
This year I won't be going to the Maldives because of covid19.
Normally I don't go to the Maldives because I can't afford it .Comment
-
I've just bought my pet duck a face mask so I can take him for a walk during corona-virus.
Its nothing flashy but it fits the bill.Comment
- Home
- News & Features
- First Timers
- IR35 / S660 / BN66
- Employee Benefit Trusts
- Agency Workers Regulations
- MSC Legislation
- Limited Companies
- Dividends
- Umbrella Company
- VAT / Flat Rate VAT
- Job News & Guides
- Money News & Guides
- Guide to Contracts
- Successful Contracting
- Contracting Overseas
- Contractor Calculators
- MVL
- Contractor Expenses
Advertisers
Contractor Services
CUK News
- Who the hell is Ethica Resolve — and is it ethical? Yesterday 10:42
- Contractor limited company pension contributions: how to extract profit tax-efficiently? Yesterday 07:44
- The weird, the wonderful and the genuinely useful: what contractors get wrong about expenses Sep 3 06:00
- Right to Work changes from October 2026: a contractor’s explainer Sep 2 15:46
- Data Kraken v Torry Harris: 5 lessons for software developer contractors Sep 2 06:09
- Loan Recall Case Study: Amanda Sep 1 06:00
- How IR35 inflated an £8.5bn consultancy bill — and tests Burnham at the Budget Aug 28 07:47
- Autumn Budget 2026: FCSA’s 5 contractor asks of John Healey Aug 27 04:15
- Andy Burnham's Zoom gripe doesn’t apply to IT contractors, say recruiters Aug 26 03:41
- Check your Loan Recall paperwork for the Isle of Man: it could matter Aug 25 03:27

Comment