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Please put more jokes here

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    My wife asked me what mansplaining is.

    I think it's a trap.
    See You Next Tuesday

    Comment


      If your wife says "If anything happens to me, I want you to meet someone new" be careful.

      Apparently, "Anything" doesn't include getting stuck in traffic.
      “The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain”

      Comment


        My dads answer to everything was alcohol..He wasn't a big drinker he was just tulip at crosswords.
        “The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain”

        Comment


          Why did my wife cross the road?

          To get back to the first shoe shop we went in three bloody hours ago!
          “The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain”

          Comment


            Only a FOOL would buy IKEA furniture. Instead I just download the instructions and keep emailing their service dept to say that I am missing a piece, until they ship me all the pieces over a six month period.
            “The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain”

            Comment


              I'm starting a petition to get abacuses mounted on to all Zimmer Frames. I hope I can count on your support.
              “The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain”

              Comment


                COTTON BUDS make ideal Toothpicks for Health and Safety Officers.
                “The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain”

                Comment


                  Government bailout criteria:
                  "Is it the NHS?"
                  If "No," proceed to massive cash payout.
                  {emotionless greeting}

                  Three Word Slogan

                  Comment


                    If Carillion really are having such financial difficulties, surely they could just reform for a comeback tour?

                    Ditch Steve Hogarth and get Fish back in, play the classics from Script for a Jester’s Tear.
                    {emotionless greeting}

                    Three Word Slogan

                    Comment


                      [texting]
                      Me: I just left and I miss you already
                      ...
                      The Wife: *typing response*
                      ...
                      Me: Can you read that to The Dog for me?
                      {emotionless greeting}

                      Three Word Slogan

                      Comment

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