Please put more jokes here

[WTFH]

NAT was telling me the other day "I'm not sure what the best thing is about living in Switzerland, but the flag is a big plus"

[WTFH]

A photon checked in at the airport and was asked if he had any luggage. He replied "No, I'm travelling light"

[vetran]

What do you call a room full of dead people?

An Oscar Pistorius surprise birthday party.

[vetran]

For NLUK

After last year's Valentines meal out, my missus refuses to go out with me this year.
All because last year she came down all dressed up to the nines and said "Well what do you think?"
I said "You look just like a movie star, Darling"
She said "Oh, how sweet, who?"

"******* ET!" I replied

[LondonManc]

Roses are red
Violets are blue
I've got Tourettes
F*** off you ****


---------------------

Roses are red
Violets are blue
I'm schizophrenic
And so am I.

[vetran]

I went to Welsh Toby Carvery yesterday and I ordered the lamb roast.

Within the first bite I found a used condom

[vetran]

Just had my Valentine's day card off Moonpig.

She hates it when I call her that.

[vetran]

I'm no expert the stock market but I do understand around Valentine's Day the price of flowers and chocolates must go up so that knickers and stockings can come down.

[vetran]

for

I find red wine improves sex with my wife.

Especially after six bottles.

[LondonManc]

I asked my North Korean penfriend what life was like growing up in Pyongyang.
He said, "can't complain."