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Please put more jokes here

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    I'm making a documentary about prince Harry going to war against the Taliban.

    It's called when Harry met Tali!
    "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

    I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

    Comment


      A fella at the races came over to me and whispered, "Do you want the winner of the next race?"
      I said "**** no!, I've only got a small garden".
      "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

      I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

      Comment


        A Red Indian introduced me to his wife...
        "This is four horses....."
        I said, 'Wow,that's a beautiful name, What does it mean....?''
        He said,
        nag,nag,nag,nag!
        "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

        I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

        Comment


          How can they call it Alcoholics Anonymous when the first thing you do is you stand up and say,
          ‘My name is John and I am an alcoholic’?
          "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

          I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

          Comment


            They've opened a new nightclub in town called G-Spot. Problem is none of the young lads can find it.
            'CUK forum personality of 2011 - Winner - Yes really!!!!

            Comment


              I don't really like writing double entendrés but every now and then I'll slip one in
              “The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain”

              Comment


                "I'M ABACUS!"
                The friend that Spartacus could count on
                “The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain”

                Comment


                  Why aren't Afghans allowed to count?
                  Because of the tally ban.
                  The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world that he didn't exist

                  Comment


                    Isn't it funny that you can hate a job with the same amount of passion that your boss claims you lack?
                    The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world that he didn't exist

                    Comment


                      Hate vegans? Fancy a change of career?
                      Discover a new animal species and call it quorn. That'll screw em up.
                      The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world that he didn't exist

                      Comment

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